Birth Story ~ Christmas Edition

Today we bring you the experience of Tania, a Doula trained at Espai Mima’m, who shares the story of her Childbirth and the Birth of her Baby on December 24th.

How beautiful it is to share these stories, opening up to you, in order to learn and get excited together.

“The best way to embrace the Nature of Childbirth, to bring it back into the Life of our Families and Circles, is to know the stories of Women, to give ourselves a Voice and to share our Wisdom.My son was born on December 24, 2017 at 7:15 p.m. at 41.4 weeks, in a slow and respected hospital birth. This is our story…

The probable date of delivery was December 14, but when the day came and when people asked me, I always replied that it was not good for me to give birth yet, and I said it truly, for fear of facing that moment and because being these dates so important my eldest daughter had the school Christmas concert, the swimming and ballet exhibition. I didn’t want to miss him for anything in the world, it was important that I was there with her.

In the dreaded monitors of week 40 and in the following ones that made me routine every 2 days, they proposed to schedule induction “so as not to risk”, and even at the insistence of the midwife on duty, I said no every time and I had to sign the paper that I assumed the risks of exceeding week 41.

On the 23rd and with the little one at her dad’s house, with everything done and already calm, I proposed to my husband to go to dinner because it would surely be the last night in a long time that we could enjoy alone.

I remember getting into bed at 12 o’clock at night and after a little while of being stretched, noticing a pain different from what I had noticed so far. A few minutes passed and again I felt the same discomfort, it wouldn’t let me lie down, so I got out of bed and thought about going to the sofa and putting on a movie. Maybe the labor was starting and the night before I had slept 5 hours and during that day I had not been able to lie down for a while, so if I was in labor I would need to rest even if I was awake and on the sofa.

I tried to get into all possible positions but my body didn’t want to be sitting or stretching, it asked me to stand, and I couldn’t concentrate on anything, everything bothered me. So I stopped the lights, turned on the television and put on the only thing there was at that time (2am), chamber concerts with Christmas airs. At least it was between cheerful and relaxing .

I was sitting on the ball, walking, looking at the hospital bag and leaning on the furniture to breathe the contractions that went from being every 15 minutes to every 5 and lasted approximately 40 seconds. I filled the bathtub, went inside, but I wasn’t comfortable and needed movement, so I went outside. The hours went by very quickly, and at 8 in the morning I woke up my partner.

My father-in-law who lives just below took us to Mútua de Terrassa. I was very excited and happy, it was like a wonderful adventure and I was not afraid. My surprise came when I entered gynecology and saw the midwife who had accompanied me throughout the pregnancy . We had talked in consultation about the impossibility of meeting because she would only be in parity on the 24th, and there she was, or rather me!

My son had granted me those days to put everything in its place and he also chose the day when I could be accompanied by that wonderful woman with whom I could be calm and feel safe.

It wasn’t necessary to talk too much, because she already knew that I didn’t want an epidural and also in a crazy youth she had tattooed me right where they prick you, so there was no option.
They proposed touch to see how I was doing and how down when he told me that I was 3cm.. It was 9 in the morning, and I had been doing that, 9 hours with contractions, without sleeping and without even sitting down. She encouraged me by telling me that the rhythm of the contractions was very good, that she was already leaving me in the delivery room and that I was sure that by noon she would have my baby in her arms.

They dimmed the lights, gave me water and left, leaving me in intimacy with my partner. I walked around the room and in each wave I leaned on his shoulders, he breathed deeply and blew little by little and I continued to imitate him so I managed to maintain concentration and overcome each contraction.

I immersed myself in a deep world, with my eyes closed all the time. I didn’t want a ball, or a birthing chair, just the peace of the space my husband gave me and his words of encouragement and encouragement.

The midwife also accompanied me for a little while, she hugged me and whispered to me that I was doing very well.

We tried nitrous oxide but it took me out of my birth planet and I was annoyed by having to be aware of all that.

The hours went by very quickly, and at 6 pm they did another touch in which I had only dilated to 4.5cm. I couldn’t believe it, if I was exhausted! I started to say that I couldn’t take it anymore, that please get it out of me no matter what. At this point, and always talking to me loosely and from love, he offered me the option of breaking the water, although he emphasized “I know you want a birth without interventions, think about it”, explaining that in some cases babies support their heads better and dilation progresses faster, although they could not assure me anything, and that possibly the contractions were more painful. I accepted, and shortly after the gynecologist came in, introduced herself, they broke my water and she left again.

The waves began to be very, very powerful and my legs were shaking from exhaustion. And then I noticed it. I noticed something different and alerted the midwife. Not even an hour had passed but my breathing had become different and everything was different, something was moving, I couldn’t describe. It was already complete! It was time to push.

I felt that I wanted to continue standing but the reality is that my strength was not with me, I had been contracting for 19 hours, and although they did not seem so many, my body did not think the same.

They dismantled the bed, put the top completely vertical, opened the part of the legs and I was sitting.

Until then they had been listening to the baby intermittently, but when I sat down they put the monitors on me and asked me to push slowly in each contraction. At that moment more people entered, there were about 5 in total and the truth is that although they did not bother me and I was barely seeing them, the fact of sitting, turning on the light, took me out of my planet. I was so exhausted that I didn’t know when the contractions were coming and I asked my midwife to tell me when I had them to push.

I remember the real feeling that I was going to die, that I couldn’t do it, I wanted to close my legs and say that I better come back the next day, but my partner was by my side all the time saying exactly what I needed to hear.

I haven’t screamed or raised my voice once since I arrived at the delivery room, but at that moment, in the pushing, an indescribable sound came from the depths.

I felt the ring of fire and when the head came out I screamed but it was liberating. In two more contractions it came out like a slippery and warm little fish straight to my chest.

I couldn’t believe what I had just experienced, what I had just done on my own.

I would look at him and think, “wow, he’s perfect, he’s beautiful and he was inside me a minute ago, he’s my son. My body has made it and it has given it to me.”

It was a feeling of love, disbelief, fascination, gratitude, that I will never forget. That wonderful weight on me, that little warmth that it gave off, that smell so unrepeatable. She could only kiss him, caress him and not stop smelling him.

When I was doing skin-to-skin in the delivery room I thanked my midwife countless times for all the support, the respect, the hugs she gave me, the words of encouragement, asking consent for everything and giving me all the information. I told him that I was sure he would be in a hurry to leave and he only replied “calm down”. He stayed for a little while watching how he clung to his chest and until they took me up to the floor.

The skin-to-skin lasted until I asked them to come so I could go to the bathroom, about 3 and a half hours.

I was grateful to have felt each contraction, that birth planet that made the hours fly by, to feel my son descend inside me, changing my breathing, breaking me in two and then being reborn with him.

It was Christmas Eve but from the time I entered at 8.30 am and until 7.15 pm I did not hear a single comment that they wanted to fold, nothing related to the important date, not a hint of haste.

Inside I felt that the fact of breaking the bag was not because they wanted to speed up to go home, the way they talked to me, gave me space, proposed it, it was because of my exhaustion and saying I can’t take it anymore after 6pm, I know it and that’s how I feel it.

Since that day in our lives there is no Christmas Eve, the family gets together to have dinner at our house and celebrate our son’s birthday. You mix the balloons with the Christmas stars, and it’s just perfect that way.”

Thank you Tania for sharing such a beautiful and important experience for you and your Family with us!